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Funeral Planning - The Purpose of the Eulogy
from:Have you ever been to a funeral service and wondered who in the world the speaker was talking about in the eulogy? Perhaps you wondered if someone else was in the casket, because the speaker was not describing the person you knew. Or maybe the eulogy (or eulogies, if more than one person shared) was more about the speaker then the deceased. Or worse yet, the speaker had no clue who the deceased was, and just spoke about the person in generalities.
So, what is the purpose of the eulogy at a funeral or memorial service? Whether one or several give the eulogy, the end result should be the brief and honest telling of the life story of the deceased. This should include those special memories of events and the special ways the deceased was in life... things like character, interests, achievements, unique ways of saying things, and don't forget humor.
If the deceased brought laughter in their living, why not remember? Some think that it is wrong to share humor and laugh at a funeral. But, consider this... some people cannot or will not cry. Yet, they may be so full of emotion they are about to burst. Laughter can allow some of that emotional release. And of course, laughter can lift the spirit and help people remember more warmly.
These memories are the fabric of what grieving loved ones and friends can hold on to, and use to help them through the times of loneliness and loss. As they remember the good times and warm memories, they are comforted by knowing that the memories can never be taken away.
An earlier comment referred to the "honest telling" of the story. The eulogy is not the time to gloss over the persons flaws and weaknesses, and try to portray them as a saint... especially if they really were not. But, neither is it the time to hang out all the dirty laundry by telling how rotten the person was.
Remember, the eulogy should tell the story and give positive (yet honest) memories for the bereaved to hold on to. As the few and brief memories are shared, each listener will find their own special memories a well. No one is perfect. So, it is ok to admit that. But, almost everyone has some good qualities about him or her that can be shared. Those planning to share in presenting the eulogy, or memories, should find these qualities and share them.
A great way to summarize what a eulogy should communicate is in this statement about, let's say, Jill... "Jill may not have been perfect, but she was perfectly Jill."
Military Funeral Flowers News
Funeral directory for Thursday, May 17, 2012 - The Daily News Online
Funeral directory for Thursday, May 17, 2012 The Daily News Online Funeral services will be held at 11 am Saturday in Pioneer Christian Fellowship Church, Route 39, Arcade. Burial will be in Delevan Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. Online condolences may be offered ... |
Joseph Glen Hart -- Bowman - The Times and Democrat
Joseph Glen Hart -- Bowman The Times and Democrat Funeral services will be held at 11 am Friday, May 18, at Duncan Chapel United Methodist Church, with the Rev. Robert E. Lee officiating. Burial will follow in the Duncan Chapel Cemetery with military honors. Pallbearers will be Christopher Glen Mizell ... |
Funeral directory for Wednesday, May 16, 2012 - The Daily News Online
Funeral directory for Wednesday, May 16, 2012 The Daily News Online Funeral services will be held at 11 am Saturday in Pioneer Christian Fellowship Church, Route 39, Arcade. Burial will be in Delevan Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. Online condolences may be offered ... |
Jaro Lepic, 87 - Iowa City Press Citizen
Jaro Lepic, 87 Iowa City Press Citizen Funeral services will be held at 12 noon, Friday, May 18, 2012, at the First United Methodist Church in Iowa City. (Sunday parking ordinance will be in effect for the streets near the church) Burial with Military Honors will be at Oakland Cemetery in ... |
Hundreds attend funeral for slain Afghan peace negotiator - Washington Post
Hundreds attend funeral for slain Afghan peace negotiator Washington Post A military honor guard carried Rahmani's coffin, covered in a black cloth with verses of the Quran embroidered on it in gold, to a cemetery in the Afghan capital. Wreaths of flowers bore a photograph of the slain negotiator. |
Bryan area deaths - Savannah Morning News
Bryan area deaths Savannah Morning News Visitation was from 6-9 pm Sunday at the Flanders Morrison Funeral Home. His funeral service was at 11 am Monday in the chapel of Flanders Morrison Funeral Home. His burial followed in the Ellabell First Baptist Cemetery with military honors. |